Pregnant!!

Well, it happened!  I’m pregnant!  

I used to be one of those people that said “oh they’re pregnant” but let me tell you what – I am pregnant.  He is not.  He doesn’t have to pee every 20 minutes.  He doesn’t have huge swollen boobs that feel like they’re about to burst.  He’s not passed out snoring on the couch every night by 8 o’clock.  He’s not pregnant, he’s going to be a father and he’s very supportive and excited and wants to go to every appointment, but he’s NOT pregnant… 

Our story:  We met about 2 years ago in February 2014– he’s freshly divorced and taking full advantage of his new found freedom and I’m extremely single.  Like, the I’ve started to resent men kind of single.  Single to the point of accepting my eventual demise into a state of spinsterhood and cat-ladydom.   And then we met and all that went out the window and I knew on our second date he was the one I was going to end up with.  I knowwwww I hate those people who say “well when you know you just know!”  But it really did happen that way!    We met in Feb, I moved in that following July and we’ve been happy ever since.  We even have a dog!  We’re dog people! 

Gross I know. 

So here we are.  We’ve been trying since April of this year to have a baby to no avail.  Which, let’s talk about that for a second – having the “we’re trying” conversation.  I never really mastered the art of having that conversation.  It’s basically a PC way of saying “we’re having a LOT of well-timed sex.”  Was a very awkward conversation to have with my dad, that’s for sure.  Then my mom was diagnosed ( Breast cancer. Stage 3.  I know.) and BAM!  The universe decided “Hey you don’t have enough on your plate, here let’s make you a baby, too!”  I must admit, this is a nice piece of joy brought to us in the midst of some pretty dark days.  But the hormones that come along with it make it difficult to hide my crazy.  I cried at the movie "The Martian."  If you've ever seen it, you know that's completely absurd.  Granted, I'd just had to put my cat down that day (had her for 16 years, the sweet girl)  so that could have been part of the issue.  That and, you know, the cancer (just add it to the list I suppose).  But still!  

So, let’s see.  I’m 7 weeks 2 days today, Tuesday November 17^th 2015.  We found out when we were on a vacation in Colorado and my BD says "let's take our baby on her first vacation."  He really is the sweetest.  Anyway, 7 wks 2 days which means our Lil’ Bear (our nickname.  I hate calling unborn babies ‘it’ because you don’t know the sex.) is the size of a blueberry.  And we are making brain cells like mad this week – to the tune of 100 brain cells a minute!  10 minutes?  A thousand brain cells.  A THOUSAND!  I feel very responsible and important… 

Symptoms?  I mean, I have to pee all the time.  Like, ALL the time.  I’m not showing yet but apparently my uterus is growing constantly and sitting directly on top of my bladder.  Ask me how I know this…  Other than that, nothing really.  I’ve had no morning sickness and no food aversions.  No cravings.  My symptoms basically consist of HUGE boobs (whoa huge) (painful huge) (I-didn’t-know-they’d-get-this-big-this-soon huge), constant urination and exhaustion that hits you like a brick wall around 7p.  So really I just pee all the time and I’m always tired. 

It seems I’ve become a huge boob’d early onset granny.   

Now, I know what you're thinking: it all seems like cake with the pee and the boobs and all.  But believe-you-me there are scary parts, too.  I'm not gonna lie.  This little blueberry has worked her way into the deepest parts of my heart already and every twinge and tweak in my belly, every time I have a gurgle or a cramp in my gut I can't help but think "what if that's how a miscarriage starts out..."  It's all the feels man, they're constant and new and scary and exciting.  I have a daily mantra: TODAY I am pregnant.  TODAY we are healthy. TODAY I am happy.  It helps when I get really scared or down or get to thinking too hard on it.  But days like today, when mom is home resting well and baby isn't giving me weird feels and BD is making me feel super loved... today is a good day.  

Fears: Constipation.  Hemorrhoids.  Fat. 

Positives: NO morning sickness.  Baby doc appt next week.  Weird dreams (Prince was in my dream last night.  Srsly).  

Belly pics to come!